07.03.2015...
To look at the "unwanted absence" positively... (1.) no one of lackluster substance is here, wasting my time right now... (2.) I know what I want, I know what I like, I know what I'm willing to put up with & if deemed necessary, walk away from... (3.) I'm currently not being bullshitted by anyone, neglected or abused. (4.) I know how to treat me & I'm very good at reflecting that. If you wish to do the same, I can give you a chance. ;-)
I've never been in a place of lack, just always overflow... I know all I have to give & want to... and that's where some of my upset has stemmed from. Being alone is not a bad thing... it's just sometimes way too quiet, especially for me. (07.04.15) I'm an active friend, all in or all out --- a natural communicator... if you start talking w me, I'll continue as much as you do & then some. If you stop any of it w no warning, I don't, until I start feeling the void.
Consistency is important to me... don't waste my time.
07.04, 09.15...pm... I'm also a lover, not a fighter... I'm willing to "go there" to clear the air; I don't let problems sit & fester, hoping they'd just up & go away. I try to exhaust all avenues before I walk. (07.10) I'm a pretty reasonable woman... it's a pity not everyone who shows up takes the time to realize that... even those who seem to have sense.
(07.04) I know how much I am loved by most... I know how much I am cared for, but "it", as of late, is more sensed by me than shown by "them". Yashi & Co. stopped by a while ago, after picking up Robé from work... dropping off a gift, for me, just because. :-) It was a good visit.
07.07.15... am... Had a good day out w Indira & Yashi... asked me a favor Saturday for Monday, didn't mind. Went to lunch after & had a good time talking.
07.10.15... am... Stopped by again yesterday to drop off two more gifts before they headed out to Naples this weekend. Had I plans to go to the retreat next weekend, I'd have what to lounge in.:-) I am, however, looking forward to being busy the next 3 Saturdays... ;-) Trying to get into going out on my own more... not something I've ever done much. My hope was to change that this year.
Tomorrow, going to Crafty to help out on Donna's Lady Liberty... next Sat, to see Tantrum at Stage Left, and the following Sat back to Crafty, maybe. :-) Nice...
pm... I've never opened a door I don't plan on walking through regularly... which is why I hate it so damn much when they (guys) stop dead in their tracks... but I'm learning how to release that, not give much of a fuck anymore when they do so... thank you, Detachment. I'm in such deep neutral these days... I did well today, not feeding on V's varied annoyances... not my flying monkeys. I consciously stayed quiet, didn't question what or why... & it ended quick enough. Me being silent during that felt weird to both of us, but I wasn't on a fishing expedition, so I refused to ask for clarity.
07.12.15... am, just after 12... Did go, did have fun. It's nice having a shared hobby & I got the chance to see more of the shop. I'd like to keep to the new schedule I've set for myself, which is now stopping in every other weekend, barring other events or situations... :-)
am... after 9... I exist in the moment until the other's activities propel me out of the moment... truly enveloping what my sign reflects. Didn't think I'd ever be this comfortable in my Gemini skin, but, I'm here & I'm happy. :-) Yay!
